I Believe

I had an MRI and dr. appt. in October. I got a good report again, praise God!! Dr. Dang said the tumor is stable and wants to continue doing what we are doing. He is VERY pleased with my report, and I AM TOO!! But I believe I will have and even better report when I go again.

I BELIEVE I was healed this past Sunday at church. I am not a person to announce something unless I feel assurance that it is true. I cannot prove I have been healed, but if that is the case, who needs faith?

I have STRUGGLED, since I was diagnosed with this brain tumor. I know God is able to heal me. But I just couldn't believe it for myself. As some ladies were praying for me on Sunday, it was as if I could FEEL a sensation come over me that my condition was different. I believe when I go for my next MRI that healing will be confirmed. One of the ladies told me to GO and DO whatever I felt God was leading me to do. I will.

God's Word tells us to, "in everything give thanks". I have not been able to thank Him for this illness until recently. I know now, without this, I would have missed some very important lessons in my life. I can't say I have learned them, but I can say that I am not the same person now that I was before this tumor.

Believing for me has been a very difficult process. I think I understand what faith is. I could have faith for everyone else. I could believe in God, and Christ, but I could not believe that God would heal me.

A book by Watchman Nee called the Life that Wins helped me understand about believing. He writes,"What is faith? Faith is not mental apprehension. It is seeing the fact and proving it...We must positively, prove Christ by an act of faith--by believing. Is it not most wonderful that in one minute, nay, in one second, all the facts which Christ has accomplished can be proven and demonstrated in your life? Such is the substantiating by faith...The great failure of a Christian is unbelief. Believe, and the fact is proven. See with faith and the fact is substantiated in experience...All is well if we believe 2 Cor. 12:9 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.' or Lk. 18:27' Jesus replied, 'What is impossible with men is possible with God." By believing the 'I WILL' of the Lord Jesus, your problem is solved. Faith is not asking for what God has already promised. Faith is believing the promise of God."

Without going into detail I will just say that Mr. Nee says that"Faith is not hoping; Faith is not feeling; and that Unbelief is the greatest sin. The greatest problem among the children of God is the failure to believe His word."

I can attest to that. So many times we think of unbelief only in terms of rejecting salvation. But if we reject any truth set forth in God's Word it is unbelief, and it is sin. This truth has helped me understand that I MUST believe, and I do! My life depends upon it. So what do I have to loose? Nothing. It is not my reputation that is at stake, nor my word that must be apprehended.It is all in God's hands. If this should not be manefested, God is still God and He knows what he is doing. I have no hope but to believe.

I titled my last blog "A dark night." I BELIEVE I can say my night is no longer dark, PRAISE GOD!